When Sherry and Julie convinced me to join them for the Flying Pig marathon, I had no idea what a crazy adventure I was in for. I was anticipating the typical weekend trip. Some sight seeing, some good food, maybe even relaxing in the hot tub. What I got was a crazy "Alice in Wonderland" meets "Wizard of Oz" adventure. I think back on some of the things that happened and still feel as if it were a dream.
Friday- 04/29/2011)
The weekend started out pretty normal as my wife Lisa and I picked up Julie from work and headed down to Cincinatti. With Lisa driving, we made great time even with a dinner stop in Piqua, OH. Cracker Barrel and road trips go hand in hand in my book. After a drive through a neighborhood that concerned my suburban travelers, we arrived at the hotel in which Lisa and I would be staying.
Julie and Sherry had booked a hotel early enough to get one downtown. I was a little late to the party so Lisa and I were booked in midtown. Although it was not in the heart of the city we had a great view.
After a quick look around the city.
The evening ended with us eating ice cream and watching "Run, Fatboy, Run" on a large outdoor TV.
Like I said, it started pretty normal, but then we went to sleep.
Saturday - 04/30/2011)
Sherry's morning didn't start out that great. First she awoke to find that Julie's jug of water had leaked and soaked the bottom half of her purse. To calm her nerves she spent painstaking minutes to perfect her cup of hotel coffee which she never got to drink since Julie tossed it out as they hurried to meet Lisa and I.
At that moment Lisa and I were dealing with a crappy start to our day as well. After parking the car next to the girls hotel, we took the stairwell to the street and immediately smelled something foul. Someone had squatted on the stairs and took a crap. It was just sitting there on the step, waiting for an unsuspecting soul to step in its squishy nastiness.
We skirted past the urban land mine and met the girls in the hotel lobby. The four of us then headed out in search of some breakfast, with Sherry enviously eyeing Lisa's cup of coffee. Even though it was after 9:00 we couldn't find any open restaurants or diners. In fact we notice a strange scarcity of people on the streets. Wasn't there a big race in town? Where was everyone? It was as if the entire city was evacuated. Maybe the terd was a WMD and the United States Army Research Institute of Infectious Diseases had shut down the city without telling us.
Our search for breakfast cuisine was fruitless, and pancakeless, and eggless. We scoured the city to no avail and ended up eating at the hotel restaurant.
After breakfast, we went to the Flying Pig expo, and found all the people. Everything went well at the expo. We had lots of fun taking pictures of the pig themed decorations.
And picked up all sorts of swag.
However, when we got back to the hotel and unpacked our swag, we discovered that we had an extra item that we had not paid for. Should we take it back? Should we keep it? Julie, Lisa, and I were deciding what to do about the extra item when Sherry's panicked voice came from the bathroom.
"Uh oh! Uh oh! Something bad is happening in here!" She hollered as she bolted from the bathroom followed by a growing pool of water.
"Scott fix it!" Julie yelled. Straddling the puddle of toilet water with one foot on the tub and the other on the sink, I reached behind the toilet and shut off the water, trying to ignore the fact that my face was practically in the toilet bowl as I reached for the valve. After calling the front desk to inform them of the plumbing fiasco we decided to head back to the expo instead of dealing with any accusing stares or awkward silences. Unfortunately, we were so caught up in the potty panic, that we forgot to take back our extra item.
On our way to the expo, I see a folded up twenty dollar bill lying on the ground with at least 10 other people standing within 6 feet of it. Casually walking up to it, I bend down and pick it up. Quickly looking around for anyone to claim it, I put it in my pocket.
During our second trip to the expo, Sherry gets a tweet from @runflyingpig stating that there is a Tweet Up at 2:00 for all Flying Pig tweeps. Looking at our watch we see that it's 1:57, so we rush to the Flying Pig Social Media booth for our very first Tweet Up and get some cool Asics shirts for free. The most exciting part, however, was meeting the Flying Pig Executive Director, Iris Bush. She asked if we had any questions about the race. So I requested that all the bands along the race route play my personal theme music as I ran by. She very politely said "We will most certainly think about not doing that"
After wandered the expo for a little longer it was time for dinner. Surely we could find a restaurant this time. Once again we headed into the city to find a great Cincinnati restaurant. Up and down the streets we traveled, but every restaurant we found was either packed with a long wait, or not the kind of food we wanted the night before the race. I'm sure the ribs ARE delicious but I don't want a pound of beef sitting in my stomach for 26 miles.
Can you guess where we ended up for dinner? That's right the hotel restaurant.
But get this, not only did we eat at the same restaurant, we were seated at the exact same table that we sat at for breakfast 8 hours earlier. It was as if we never left, as if the whole thing was a strange dream.
The strangeness continued. During dinner, the waitress was clearing some of our plates away and accidentily spills oil on Sherry's shoes, but they aren't Sherry's shoes, they are Julie's shoes (don't ask, it would take a whole other blog post). Then as she was enjoying her pasta with sauce and mushrooms, Sherry discovers three odd discs in her food. The look like pepperonis but there was no pepperoni in the buffet line. They are dark like the mushrooms but they are definitely not mushrooms.
"Scott, taste it." some commands, and I obediently listen. Fearing the foul taste that was waiting for me, I was quite relieved to discover they were only cardboard discs. We show the waitress our strange appetizer and after convincing her that we didn't bring them with us she sends the manager to our table who gave us all our meals and desserts for free.
I was a day filled with "Aww Crap...Woo Hoo" moments, but it was also exhausting. It was time for bed. We had a big race to run tomorrow.
